{Birthday}

On March 27th we celebrated my dad's birthday. We met my family at a restaurant called Smash Burger in Draper to eat together. We had never been there before, but had heard really good things about it so we were excited to try it. I have to say that it was fabulous, in my opinion--especially the flash-fried veggies. Mmmmm.

After eating we went to a playground at a cute park in Draper. I'm not quite sure how Branigan and Julie knew where this park was, but it was perfect for the kids. It was the first time that Eli had ever been on a swing since most of the parks by our home don't have swings. So, I put him on one right when we got there. He LOVED it! He was laughing and squealing--it was great. Little Beau loved the swings, too. Isaac ran over to the slides with his cousins, Jonathan and Dylan, then they eventually ended up on the swings, too. It was a little chilly, but overall a great Spring day. After we played at the park we went to Cold Stone for some ice cream. Happy Birthday, Dad!

Eli going down the slide--he loved them

Grandpa Brad pushing Isaac on the swings

Eli being a 'big boy'

Cute little Beau with his daddy, Branigan. How cute is that picture? You can see my dad and Isaac along with Tyler holding Dylan in the background.

Jonathan with Grandma Rondi and Julie (looking like a super-model) in the background.

David and Eli--I love how happy Eli looks in this picture

Eli swinging high, and SO happy.

{Cheerios}

Eli loves Cheerios. Every time I turn around he is trying to get in the pantry to get more Cheerios. I finally just gave him the whole container. He loved it and thought he was such a big boy. Note: If you come to our house and want Cheerios they may or may not be contaminated with Eli slobber. Most likely not, though, because later that day Eli, ever so kindly, dumped the container of Cheerios on the floor. Thanks, Eli. A whole container of delicious Cheerios wasted.

{Valentine's Day}

I know it's a little late for posting about Valentine's Day, but I'm gonna do it anyway. Ha, ha! If it weren't for technical difficulties with my camera this would have been posted over a month ago, so there. Valentine's Day was pretty sweet this year. David hates Valentine's Day, so I'm not going to even talk about him. Is there a name for people like that? I mean, a Grinch or a Scrooge for someone who dislikes Christmas, but what about Valentine's Day haters? Anyhoo, I got up early and placed wrapped gifts for everyone on the table that I decked out with a pink table cloth, red paper plates and cute napkins with hearts on them. I planned to make pink pancakes and strawberry milk for breakfast with fresh strawberries. Mmmm. So, the boys woke up, opened their gifts--books for both and crayons and coloring book for Isaac. Nothing big, but enough that they were thrilled. Then I was off to make breakfast. It was delicious, thank you very much.

Isaac with his book

Eli opening his gifts with the aid of the Valentine Grinch

Another shot of the boys with their loot

Strawberry milk served in an adorable cup that my awesome Cousin, BreeAnn gave me for Valentine's Day. At least somebody loves me. =)

The pink pancakes

{Viva, Las Vegas!}

I'm going to be posting a little out of order--I still have Valentines Day to post about, but like I said in my previous post, I'm having issues uploading pictures from my camera. Dang it.

We went on a road-trip to Las Vegas on March 11th. The drive this year with the boys wasn't nearly as bad as last year, thank goodness. I didn't want to repeat Eli's 5 hour screaming fest or Isaac's biting into a glow stick and getting pink glow fluid in his mouth. That was super-scary for me--I was pretty sure he would die from it. Anyway, we arrived in Vegas on Thursday night and pretty much went to bed--or tried to, that is. Eli figured out how to climb out of the play-pen and wouldn't stay in bed. He had a rough adjustment. I ended up having to cradle him and bounce on the edge of the bed until he was totally asleep--45 minutes later, I would be able to finally put him in the play-pen and he would sleep through the night. Naps were in a similar fashion, although by the third day there he would just go sit on the king-sized bed, watch Elmo and fall asleep on his own. Worked for me!

The weather wasn't very cooperative. It was windy and chilly all but the last two days we were there. So, the boys only went swimming twice. Bummer for them. We still went to the playground, though. We also took them to the Freemont Street Experience--a first for me, we saw the dancing fountains at Bellagio, and we even took a ride on the monorail from the Luxor to Mandalay Bay--Isaac was in heaven. It's a good thing that my dad was smart enough to bring the Wii, because we spent a lot of time in the condo because of the weather. It was still a great trip and we look forward to next year.

Here are many, many pictures of the trip. I wasn't able to upload any from the pool where the boys went swimming, but there are plenty of others.

Isaac playing the Wii--this kiddo rocks at Bowling

Eli jumping on the bed in the master bedroom

Eli at the playground

All of us at the Bellagio, waiting for the fountain show to start.

Grandpa Brad and Eli

Isaac at the Conservatory in the Bellagio

Eli chillin' on the ride home. Thank goodness for portable DVD players and Elmo!

Isaac loved the drive--he's the best, until he would bother Eli.

Isaac took my picture while I was trying to feed Eli some yogurt. He insisted that it post the picture on here. Blah.

{I'm Back}

I have to apologize for being absent from the blogging world for a while. I have had a lot going on, and not much free time to keep things updated. I hope to post at least two updates this week, but I have been having issues with uploading my photos onto blogger for the past couple months. So, please bear with me and as I have time this week I will surely update you all on the goings on in my world.

Love,

Tara

{Jarrod}

This is one of my favorite photos of Jarrod (with Bran and Julie). It was taken at Black Angus restaurant where we all had dinner in celebration of Jarrod's birthday. He's holding a box of golf balls that Branigan and Julie gave him after they had given him one of their wedding gifts as a gag gift. It was really funny, but after that we all knew that Jarrod loved "stuff".

Two days ago marked 4 years since we lost Jarrod. It is so hard for me to believe that he has been gone that long. I can picture him like I just saw him yesterday and the memories are still so vivid in my mind. Words can not express how grateful I am that we were able to have Jarrod in our home for nearly two years before he died. It brings me comfort to know that even though Jarrod never had children of his own, he was with David and me through the end of my pregnancy with Isaac and was almost a 2nd dad to him during his first 18 months. The second Jarrod would walk in the door from work he would ask me where Isaac was. If he was napping Jarrod would get all grumpy and, most of the time, he would sneak in Isaac's room just to watch him sleep. He loved him so much--an Isaac loved him, too. I loved them both.

Sometimes I find myself repeating some of the last conversations I had with Jarrod in my head and I want to change things that I said to him. I wish that when he expressed fear over the upcoming bone marrow transplant I wouldn't have told him not to worry and that everything would be just fine. If I had said he shouldn't do it would he have waited? Probably not, but I hate that I acted so sure that everything would work out exactly the way it was supposed to. The saying is 'plan for the best, but expect the worst'. Yeah, I didn't expect the worst--the worst never crossed my mind. But, here I sit with no older brother, missing him so bad that I can't stop the tears as I type this. I wish he were here, living with us like he was supposed to be. I wish he had married and had a family of his own. Little OCD Jarrod's running around, not getting a blade of grass or speck of dirt anywhere. I can only imagine how great that would be and how much we would tease him. I miss you, Jarrod.

{Mom}

Yesterday marked the 3 year anniversary of the death of my mom. I had a long conversation with an old friend yesterday about the deaths of both of our Mom's. I can't help but feel that there was more I could have done for my mom in the months before her death. I know that her dying was not my fault and that she is now in a much better place, but I feel sadness in having had the relationship we did in the few years prior to her death. I felt like the mom, much of the time, and that I was trying to take care of her instead of the way it ought to have been. In my heart I always hoped that she would go back to the mom I always knew growing up, and it has been so sad for me to realize that my 'real' mom never came back, even though there were glimpses of her occasionally. It breaks my heart. I try as hard as I can to just cling to the memories of my childhood and of what it was like to have a mom take care of me, but it's hard at times.

I can't warn people enough about the dangers of addiction and I'm constantly sharing my experiences with others about how my Mom's addiction affected my life and the lives of my entire family. It's difficult knowing how much she struggled and how alone she must have felt, suffering with this horrible disease. But, no matter what, I'll always love her and miss her.

Mom and Me--June 2001